Sandwiches

Around lunch time yesterday I sat with a delicious looking brie and bacon sandwich and an inward excitement at sitting down all day to watch the rest of the cricket. By the time I had finished the sandwich I felt bloated and sick and was nearly sent over the edge by England's batting display, although i use the word 'display' in it's loosest sense. To me a display is a man standing on the wing of an aircraft with just his pants holding him down as the plane swoops over your head, a feat of courage and sending shivers down the spine of every spectator. Oddly enough I didn't really feel that excitement watching England bat, they looked nervous, bored, tired, lazy, scared, listless...I could go on but really can't be bothered to. Which is exactly how England looked yesterday.

So led on the sofa, feeling sorry for myself with a artery blasting filler surging round my body, I didn't expect too much from the bowlers that would mean England weren't going to be chasing anything less than 350. I expected New Zealand to declare once they reached the target they had set themselves and then mock the England batsmen again.

But what's this? Do I see a fightback? Or are my eyes so full of bacon fat that they can no longer comprehend even basic images? No, a fightback it is! A fightback in the shape of a man with a beard and a bandanna! Monty bowled like a legend and the Kiwi's didn't even set us a target of over 300. But there is always that feeling at the bottom of every Englishman's stomach that screams 'I know it looks like we should do it but you just know we are going to fail!'

Fail we did not, Strauss had another great innings and added to his 11 Test centuries, Vaughan batted well and Pietersen played well for his 42. things did become a little more depressing when Bell and Collingwood were at the crease, I could almost feel their impending doom sat with me on the sofa, but they stayed in and brought us home.

In all fairness we should be winning these Tests, but we are making it very difficult for ourselves. New Zealand are a good team and have a lot of tough players but we should still be beating them, hopefully our middle order can pick things up a bit, or the arrival of the South Africans could look daunting.